Feeling Lonely & Disconnected?
(Image courtesy of Fran)
With COVID it’s quite easy to slip into a sense of loneliness and disorientation because we are technically experiencing forced-disconnection from people in general.
In some cases, especially when it comes to our current political climate, you might even be experiencing a choice-based disconnection from others! Nonetheless, when we hit a place of inner discomfort, the first place we tend to seek relief is in something or someone OUTSIDE ourselves.
It works because it’s a good distraction. Shoot, a day of binging Ozark on Netflix will certainly help you temporarily forget your problems! The thorn in your side here though is the word TEMPORARILY.
Ultimately, once said distraction is over, all your inner garbage comes back, and it usually comes back worse because we’ve then started to make life choices based on said external sources. This muddies the water even more.
Let's do an example...
For example, let’s say you are feeling exceptionally lonely and needy because your social and dating life has obviously come to a halt. (Frankly, my heart does go out to all the singles out there because it’s quite challenging to meet new people at the moment unless you have a love for online dating.)
So to remedy that problem, you latch on to an old high-school buddy that you reconnected with on Facebook. You aren’t particularly interested romantically in that person, but won’t flirting be fun and distracting about now?
You always knew that he/she was into you, so it’s a safe bet to get some attention. Plus, your families are in the same social circle so you do get to see this person face-to-face once in a while at small, COVID approved functions of course.
Meanwhile, said buddy is super stoked that you are paying attention to him/her, and on top of that, your mom finds out and is super pleased because she always thought your buddy was so kind, generous, and intelligent. “See, I TOLD you that you two should go out together,” mom says.
Now you feel worse because it’s quite shitty to lead someone on, and now you got your mom up your back, yacking away about your love life and both moms planning your wedding. Ok, so a bit of a juvenile example, but this kind of stuff happens! This is what we do.
There is a better way, though, to manage feelings of loneliness and disconnection from others and/or self.
Let’s start with the truth. As a diving being, you are NEVER alone. And at soul-level, you never feel lonely, ever, because you are ALWAYS connected to the Universe.
Loneliness is an EGO thing. And somewhere along the way, you decided that being alone was bad. It’s not a surprise. What’s that fairy tale about the old woman who lives in a shoe with a gazillion cats? Who wants to look like that?
Two Easy Steps
So the first step is to get out of your head and connect with your real self and the Source energy that flows through you.
- Go for a walk in nature.
- Do some breathing exercises to take the focus off your mind chatter.
- Do some Tapping.
The second step is that whenever you are feeling disconnected, go back to step 1 and practice, practice, practice.
Rinse and repeat, practice, practice, practice. After all, even the most skilled athletes continue to practice every day!
No, this process doesn’t sound fun or glorious. But it FEELS glorious once you get there. And you can actually make it fun.
I look forward to my morning “Coffee with the Universe” routine all the time because I’ve filled it with things I love to do like journaling, planning, and meditating.
Following the steps above is how you experience inner-peace no matter the outside circumstances. This is how you can stop feeling lonely and disconnected and feel totally connected to everything.
It doesn’t mean that you should denounce connecting with others (humans are social beings after all). It just means that you connect to connect for the joy of it versus NEEDING it in order to be comfortable on the inside.